Keeping Up with the Joneses

Guess what? The Joneses, those neighbors who seem to have it all together, a great house, fun vacations, shiny cars? They’re probably a mess. You’re busy trying to measure up and they’re drowning in debt to maintain the facade and no one is happy.

We know the truth, that the pursuit of stuff does not lead to happiness. We keep hoping it will as it clutters our homes, our cars, our inbox and worst of all, our minds. We exchange our precious time in its pursuit. We go mad with worry about how to pay for the stuff we already have and the stuff we want, all the while knowing that that we should stop.  

A 2015 credit card debt study revealed that the average US household has over $15,000 in credit card debt alone. Many long time homeowners who should have reached the end of their mortgages went heavily into debt anew during the last housing bubble or borrowed against their home’s equity. I’m not advocating for being a snoop, but if you find yourself with neighbor envy, the mortgage information is public record. You’ll be surprised at what you find.

The bottom line though, is to ask what we gain when we go into debt or when we trade our money (which is just time and life energy) for things that align with our goals? Do we make mindful purchases or delay a decision to give it genuine thought? If not, I’ll share some tactics that have worked well for me:

1. Shop with a list. For items like food and other consumables, a little pre-planning or automating go a long way. We generally eat the same types of food every week, so our shopping trips (and related spending) are predictable. This also helps control impulse purchases.
2. Ask if the purchase is a want or a need. Be honest about this. Consider the trade-off before you buy it. Frame it in a way that has meaning for you. For me, asking myself if the item is worth delaying retirement is a great trick. Maybe you are saving for a vacation, so your question would be, “Do I want this item or do I want to go to Hawaii?” You get the idea.
3. If you decide that you DO want the item, wait 24 hours (or more). Sometimes putting  some time and distance is enough to change your mind.
4. Choose quality over quantity. In the long run, you’ll get more financial benefit (and enjoyment) over a higher quality item than more items of poorer quality. How many pairs of jeans do you really need anyway?
5. Frequently check your spending. Use your bank’s online tools to your advantage. Most banks offer categorization which will reveal that those little indulgences and what you think of as small, negligible purchases really do add up.
6. Only shop when you need something specific. If you feel the urge to shop out of boredom, try these other activities instead.

What other tactics are helpful for mindful spending?

What long-term goals do you have that can help you stay on track?